I do all my own stunts

A different kind of cake recipe

The Ubiquitous Diaper Cake

Ever since Carrie and Samantha showed up to Miranda's baby shower with one of these lovelies, there has scarcely been a gathering of oohh-ing and aaahh-ing females in which a diaper cake has not been present.  I used to be very much a Miranda...eschewing the cutesy, cliched, baby-crazed atmosphere of a shower, praying that there would be a sufficient amount of chardonnay on offer to dull my senses enough to endure the length of the event.  But, slowly, I've come around.  I'm not quite a Charlotte yet, but for the most part, I have discarded my bad attitude and really do enjoy a good baby shower.  In reality, I haven't had a choice...my friends won't stop procreating.  And if there are two things I absolutely enjoy, they are hosting parties and crafting.  So, I've thrown a million of these showers.  I've planned a million cheezy games, researched and tested thousands of non-alcoholic punch recipes, envisaged hundreds of ways to incorporate onesies and rattles into decorating schemes, and built dozens of these baby diaper cakes.  The first one I attempted took me all day involving multiple trips to the grocery store for more diapers, but in the years since, I've perfected my technique and can practically whip one of these out in my sleep.  

This particular cake is for my gorgeous and spirited cousin, Lindsey.  She is expecting a baby girl, but I thought the traditional pastel pink was too boring a color scheme for Lindsey.  She needed something less predictable.  So, I decided to go with pink and orange.  You can use any colors you like.  In the past, I've made cakes in pinks, blues, browns, greens.  I once even created an orange and black Halloween-themed diaper cake.  No joke.  

Here is what you will need:

+ Cardboard cake rounds, for a 3-tiered cake you will need 3, I used 8'', 10'' and 12'' diameters, they have these at Michael's in the cake decorating section

+ Cardboard tubing cut into 4'' lengths, or spent toilet paper rolls, 5 should be sufficient

+ Glue gun + glue

+  Diapers, I used a pack of 78 which was just enough, I recommend Pampers Swaddlers because they are mostly white which I find more aesthetically pleasing in a cake rather than some diapers which are covered in ninja turtle or my little pony graphics

+ Rubber bands

+ Ribbon

+ Adornments: use whatever you like in complimentary colors, for example:  stuffed animals, pacifiers, wash cloths, teething rings, baby powder, rattles, diaper pins 

+ Silk flowers, optional 

Step 1:  Make the cake structure.

Use a glue gun to glue the cardboard tubing to the cake rounds.  Something I learned:  Using spent toilet paper rolls is quite a bit easier than cutting a long tube into 4'' lengths yourself.  It ensures that the cake will be perfectly level.  As you can see in the above photo, I was struggling with 'crooked cake' syndrome and it took me a while to correct it.  Also, using 3 cardboard tubes to support the bottom tier makes a sturdier base.  

Step 2:  Roll the diapers tightly keeping the white section on the outside of the roll.  Secure each diaper with a rubber band.  To save time, you may want to refrain from rolling some of the diapers.  You can use these ones by just wrapping them around the cardboard support tubes at the interior of the cake where they won't be seen.  Make sure to use only rolled, banded diapers at the outer edges of the cake for a more uniform appearance.  

Step 3:  Decide what you will use as a cake topper and how you will engineer its secure placement on the cake.  

I like to use something fun like a stuffed animal as a cake topper, but instead of just balancing it on top, I usually build the cake around it, like this:

In this instance, I balanced the stuffed dog on the cardboard tube on the top tier of the cake and secured its legs with a rubber band.  I then surrounded the legs with rolled, banded diapers and secured the entire tier with a large rubber band.  

Step 4:  Fill the rest of the cake tiers with diapers and secure each tier with large rubber bands (or tie a few rubber bands together to get the size you want).  

Step 5:  Use your colorful baby items to adorn the cake.  Secure them as best you can by tucking them under the rubber bands.  You may have to use your imagination.  

Step 6:  Use matching ribbon to surround each tier and to disguise the rubber bands.  I have been on a tulle kick lately, so that's what I used this time.  

Step 7:  Tuck in some silk flowers around the bows or use a glue gun to secure them (making sure not to get glue on any diapers because the shower recipient will definitely want to use the diapers after she disassembles the cake).  

Et, voila.  You're done!  

Cute, right?  All you Charlottes are loving this, I'm sure.  And you Mirandas out there are probably throwing up.  Oh well, you can't please everyone.  

Fall crafternoon

Mohair Pumpkins

The fall weather here in Seattle has been absolutely gorgeous these past few days.  Lovely, sunny mornings with a crisp breeze in the air.  Temperatures around 65 degrees making me very, very happy as I am an enormous baby when it comes to being cold.  

Despite the warm weather, I have fully embraced the coming of fall.  The fashions - new school clothes are a must, football tailgates, halloween costumes, pumpkins and seasonal decorating schemes.  I am still working on a festive front door design concept, but I decided to kick off the season with a simple, interior embellishment.  

This craft comes from the always stylish and refined Martha Stewart.  It was a Craft of the Day about a week ago.  And while I am surely enchanted by the pale, monochromatic peachy-lemony-orange mohair Martha features in her version of this craft, I have a little more 'in your face' sensibility when it comes to color.  In addition, I have some dazzling hand-dyed mohair in my yarn stash collection which I've been valiantly striving to employ.  

So, purple, pink and green pumpkins it is.  We'll just call it surrealism.  

Here's how you make it 

You will need:

styrofoam balls

yarn

stick pins

glue gun + glue

twigs, cut into about 1 inch lengths

Cut off the bottom of the styrofoam balls using a serrated kitchen knife (this ensures that the pumpkins sit upright).  Place a stick pin at the top of the ball and wrap the end of the yarn around it a couple times.  Wrap the yarn around the ball until it is entirely covered.  Cut the yarn leaving about a 3 inch tail.  Tie it to the pin and cut off the excess.  Drive the pin into the styrofoam ball securing the yarn.  Use a gluegun to adhere the twigs to the top of the yarn pumpkins.  

Entirely simple, quick and satisfying.

Happy fall decorating to you.  

Incroyable!

Jean K Jean

Bringing the beret back

This guy makes me laugh so hard.  

I don't know if you've noticed, but the beret is making a comeback.  Merci, Jean K Jean.  Just kidding, I highly doubt the beret's popularity can be attributed to Keenan Thompson's SNL character, but you guys don't mind if I make some imaginary connections for the sake of a blog post that makes me laugh, do you?  Mais, non.  

C'est moi.  

I have a colossal stash of yarn.  Mostly odds and ends left over from past knitting projects, but I also have a healthy inventory of untouched skeins from elaborate enterprises that lost my interest before I even picked up my needles.  If you're like me, you've already realized that a knitting hobby is like a cocaine habit.  It'll make you go broke.  You could end up homeless on the streets.  But of course, you would have plenty of warm, luxurious sweaters to keep you snug at night.  

I made a deal with myself.  No new yarn purchases until an attempt was made to exhaust some of my yarn stash.  Accordingly, I've been making a lot of quick, little items like washcloths and hats.  Ergo, this beret.  

It's not really the classic Jean K Jean style, it's more like a bulbous beanie.  But it'll keep you warm at football games or on your morning walk to the bus stop.  It is incredibly easy to make and everybody has at least one skein of worsted weight yarn stashed somewhere in their house, right?  Zut alors!  

Here's how you make it:

I used worsted weight wool, US 8 16 inch circular needles and US 8 double pointed needles.  

SSK (slip, slip, knit) Slip next 2 stitches as if to knit, one at a time, to the right needle; insert left needle into fronts of these 2 stitches and knit them together.

Cast on 80 stitches with the circular needles.  Mark beginning of round and join.  Work in K1, P1 rib for 1 1/2 inches.  

Increase round:  (K1, K into front and back of stitch) all the way around = 120 stitches.  

Knit until beret measures 4 1/2 inches from beginning.  Place markers every 20 stitches = 6 markers total.  

Decrease round:  (SSK, knit to marker, slip marker) all the way around.  Knit 1 round even.  Repeat last 2 rounds 6 more times then repeat the decrease row every row until 6 stitches remain.  Switch to double pointed needles when beret is too small for the circular needles.  

Using a tapestry needle, draw the yarn through the remaining 6 stitches and secure with a knot on underside of work.  Weave in ends.  

Voila.

Let's do some math

Shall we?  

        +

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                 x

( + )

                 =

Miraculous, right?

I have a bit of a problem.  I tend to frequent the funky home decor boutiques way too much for my own good.  I luuurve them.  From totally glammed out refurbished vintage pieces to dusty french flea market treasures.  I covet the modern, the retro, the indie, the kitschy, the classic, and sometimes even the fugly.  I think the extraordinary Freddie Mercury said it best: I want it all, I want it now.  

Unfortunately, what hinders me in having it all, having it now, is the slight problem of not having enough space.  Just kidding.  It's not having enough money!  I almost had you there for a second, right?

For all you locals, I was at the marvelous Revival Home and Garden in Georgetown recently.  If you haven't been yet, you must go.  It'll make you want to die.  And you have to stop by Great Stuff next door.  The name says it all.  Anyway, I was just salivating over everything in Revival Home and Garden one Saturday morning and fell in love with these white twiggy mirrors.  I had to make them mine.  Sadly, purchasing them was out of the question as I was not in the mood to place a second mortgage the house that day.  So, I decided to steal borrow the idea and make them.  

I used Oregon Grape branches from our back yard.  I cut them into about 4 inch pieces, primed them, painted them and then used my trusty glue gun to attach them to plain, inexpensive mirrors.  

The twigs kind of bring a funky, log cabin-ey feel to the room.  A little rustic, but the white paint keeps it looking fresh and modern.  I suppose they won't really jive with everyone's design aesthetic, but mine is pretty darn eclectic and these homemade twiggy mirrors fit in great.  

What do you think?

30 minute kitchen makeover

Simple, quick, color infusion

Just terrible, right?

We live in an old house.  The kitchen is surprisingly large for a home built in 1938, but it is very poorly laid out.  No counter space, few cabinets and an empty, awkward corner that is absolutely bare.  

Also, the kitchen has lime green trim.  Lime green.  It has been my private (now public) shame ever since we moved in 3 years ago.  Why not just paint, you ask?  All I can say is, 'cosmetic fixer' is a painfully delicate euphemism for 'you better be ready to work, friends'.  We have already painted 90% of the interior surfaces of this lovely menace of a home; our paintbrush bristles have worn down to frayed, pathetic nubs.  Also, as I previously described, we've spent a lot of time slaving in the yard.  We're tired, OK?  

To help alleviate the lack of counters and other waist-level surfaces in our kitchen, my mom generously donated this cafe table which was formerly used in one of her cookie stores.  It's entirely authentic, even down to the discarded wad of chewing gum stuck to the underside.  (Who does that?).  The table, while functional - it made a fine mail-collection receptacle and additional dish drying zone - just wasn't very cute.  

It needed an upgrade.  Preferably one where the resulting cuteness vastly outweighed the amount of effort involved in achieving it.  I'm tired, remember?  

Much better, right?  

Here's what I did:  I bought a piece of colorful, retro-inspired fabric, hemmed the edges and used fabric glue to attach a matching grosgrain ribbon.  No, Heidi, Michael and Nina  would not be impressed, but I don't care.  I believe in fabric glue.  It is my friend and would never betray me like my venomous sewing machine.  

Quite an improvement, right?  It really took less than 30 minutes.  It was so simple, I might even make a new one for fall.